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January 31, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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8.30am (with breakfast) 500mg Metformin, Viridian Multivitamin, Viridian B12
2pm (with lunch) 500mg Metformin
8pm (with dinner) 500mg Metformin, 0.5ml Suprefact sc

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January 30, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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8.30am (with breakfast) 500mg Metformin, Viridian Multivitamin, Viridian B12
2pm (with lunch) 500mg Metformin
8pm (with dinner) 500mg Metformin, 0.5ml Suprefact sc

Bump Stalking January 29, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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8.30am (with breakfast) 500mg Metformin, Viridian Multivitamin, Viridian B12
2pm (with lunch) 500mg Metformin
8pm (with dinner) 500mg Metformin, 0.5ml Suprefact sc

I find myself staring at bumps. I can’t help it. I don’t compare anymore, to my own missing bump, as I am no longer missing a bump. I just can’t look away. And yet looking makes me sick, with envy, with lust, with longing, with sadness, with fear, but I just can’t look away.

Lately I have become really bothered by the 2 child families, especially the ones with a small baby in a Phil & Teds, it’s even worse if it is black. M has started noticing them too. He will tell me when he saw a buggy like ours, and points out that there was a tiny baby in it. He is not trying to make me feel jealous or to upset me, he is just saying, in his words, that he wants to do that too, have that buggy set up too.

It interests me how he expresses his desire for another child. He has never outright said it and does say that he would be happy to be finished with IVF right.now.! but he lets me know that he wants another, in his own way.

A new week January 28, 2008

Posted by The Mom in IVF, medication.
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8.30am (with breakfast) 500mg Metformin, Viridian Multivitamin, Viridian B12
2pm (with lunch) 500mg Metformin
8pm (with dinner) 500mg Metformin, 0.5ml Suprefact sc

It’s a new week and we are heading into a new month so I thought I would start to record the meds I take each day. I know I have done up the calendar before but this way it is more visible on a day to day basis.

The plan for me was to start taking Primolut (like Provera) on Feb 6th to bring on AF before my cycle. Well, AF seems to have started on her own today… go figure. If you count the 24 hours of spotting at the start of the month then I am CD 25, if you don’t count the spotting then I am on CD 69, regardless which way you look at it the whole thing is whacked out! Anyway, I am still on track for egg collection at the start of March, except for forgetting to do my down reg shot last night – DOH!

I have been thinking for a while about how I feel about my friends pregnancy and as illogical as it seems I feel like if they bring their baby home then I will get to bring mine home. In the almost 3 years since our children were born we have had more than our fair share of heart ache, they more than us but this baby brings hope to me.

2 & 3/4 Penalty Points January 26, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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I have been down regulating for 5 days now and the metallic taste in my mouth is killing me! There are no other symptoms yet which, of course, is great.

If you hold a mobile phone while driving in Ireland (and you are caught holding it) you will get an automatic 2 penalty points & a €60 fine*. If you get 12 points you are officially disqualified from driving for 6 months (although in typical Oirish fashion this cannot be enforced).

Anyway I will get to my point now. It is illegal to hold a mobile phone but not to hold your toddlers hand, nor is it illegal to have a screaming toddler in the car. Today I drove for 30 minutes with D screaming in the back of the car. He didn’t let up. He just changed what he screamed about!

*If you are interested you can find out what you actually get Penalty Points for here

Don’t shoot the stretch marks January 24, 2008

Posted by The Mom in infertility, IVF.
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They exist, I have a lot of them. Many of them came with my son and are his version of graffiti in the “I was here, never forget it!” I am injecting to down regulate and stretch marks don’t take well to being injected into. Tonight it took 4 attempts to hit a bit of skin 🙂

I got an email from the clinic about M’s SA

Clinic protocol is such that we repeat a full semen analysis annually regardless of the cycles in between. However, these protocols are not set in stone and we try to accommodate patients as best we can. To that end I will not insist that M repeats the semen analysis but you have to be the ones to bear the risk that there may be problems with the sample on the day of egg recovery. The likelihood of any major problem is very small and I don’t expect such but it cannot be completely discounted.

If you are happy with this arrangement then you must reply to this email stating that you are willing to bear any of the aforementioned risk so that I can place a copy of the email in your chart.

I have gone ahead and booked the SA because I know that I this will be the time that there is an infection, white blood cells etc and it will all be my fault for not going ahead with it. Needless to say it will cost €100 (what doesn’t these days?) but the good news is that my smear is still in date. My plan is to not need to get another smear done for IVF purposes.

The next No 1 January 24, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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This came through Niobe and I really liked it.

1. Click on this link. The title of the page is the name of your band.

2. Click on this link. The last four words of the final quotation on the page are the title of your album.

3. Click on this link. The third picture is your album cover.

4. Take the pic, add your band name and album title and voilà!

Here is mine…

Stop the bus I want to get off January 23, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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Today I am filled with the dread of 2.5 years of milk free life before we see the allergist again. I am sick with worry about the fact that we now have an epi pen in our lives. I looked at my perfect little boy in the supermarket earlier who, when I picked up milk off the shelf, said “I no have milk, milk make me belly sick” and I was so filled with pride, that at 2y9m he knows that, but also dread that some time somewhere when I turn my back he will take a bite of someones cheese sandwich or a mouth full of someones milk and in that moment I could lose my boy. I know that it is a big if but it is there and today I don’t want to know.

Last night I was reminded of the weekend when he was 4 weeks told. The PITA public health nurse was giving out that he hadn’t returned to his birth weight and informed me that I would have to supplement him. Thankfully I rang my lactation consultant for guidance as to what to do and she assured me that I could pump & supplement him with EBM. Knowing now what I know now I know that that phone call may well have saved his life.

One last thought for the day January 22, 2008

Posted by The Mom in Uncategorized.
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I started down regulating today. I completely forgot about it and my new phone needs to be charged (left the charger in my mothers house) so I am back using the antique and therefore don’t have any alarms set. It was really itchy after it was done but that has passed.

I missed a call from the clinic this morning and another this afternoon. They finally got me after 5 and we talked about what they wanted done before the cycle goes ahead. M has to go for another SA & I have to have my prolactin and TSH checked.

M hasn’t had a full SA for 2 years but they have checked count, morphology and motility each time he has provided a sample for a cycle… and while his numbers improved over time the antibodies are still there and I am not kidding myself that anything is ever going to be good enough to get us off the ICSI bench and onto the IVF one. We are where we are and nothing is going to change that. Which leads me to the question of why they want to do the SA. In order for it to happen we have to go to Dublin on my birthday (which is not how I planned spending my birthday), 100km each way, so that M can provide the sample and I can give them €100 for the pleasure… hmmm… I don’t think so. This is not logical. OK if they were looking for infection or anything like that but I will be honest and say I think they are looking for €100! I have emailed the manager of the embryology department to see what he has to say.

I am validated January 22, 2008

Posted by The Mom in allergies, parenting.
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Today we went back to see the allergist to have skin tests and get the results of D’s blood tests that were done in November. The skin test & blood results showed a significant allergy to milk protein & its derivatives. We left the consultation €420 lighter with a prescription for antihistamines and an epi pen. He said that he doesn’t normally give the epi pen to milk allergy kids but because D has presented twice with significant respiratory complications after being exposed to milk he is getting, or rather I am getting, a pen.

He insisted we see the dietitian but to be honest because I had kept him cows milk free from birth I knew everything she said to me.

I am sick and tired of all of the eye rolls that have come after I said that I was restricting what he ate “just in case” and now I know that I was right to be careful.

So… I am validated!