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Random thoughts May 30, 2008

Posted by Laura in Garden, pregnancy.
9 comments

My boobs are HUGE!

I have 3rd trimester symptoms up the yazoo. Itchy skin, waddling, peeing at night, general uncomfortableness, visual disturbance, palpitations. The list goes on but I won’t. I haven’t had a decent night sleep in weeks and along with the all day sickness I am wondering if I am doing the Gitmo version of pregnancy (sleep deprivation and bizarre torture)

D has hayfever & the poor boy is struggling & we are both dealing with too much snot.

D says “What are we going to do?” a LOT! Today I told him that I didn’t want him to ask that any more (I ask him that most every day, it makes no difference) so he said “Mamma, what I and I self gonna do?” Far too cute!

My favourite lunch at the moment is ham, lettuce, sun dried tomatoes (in oil) & sweet pepper relish on white bread or a demi baguette. Yum, yum, o-yum.

We are sitting watching The Princess Bride while waiting for the DH.L man to bring my Birkenstocks.

I need to follow up on my maternity clothes.

I just called the DH.L office and discovered that the silly woman that I spoke to yesterday marked them both for delivery & collection today so they were left in the depot! Because it is a long weekend I won’t get them until Tuesday. AARRGGHH

My skin is on FIRE! D wants to see the fire coming out of my skin and can’t understand that the fire is inside Mamma’s skin, not coming out of it.

I took a shower & am dressed in a vest & pants and it is no better. Right now it is my right ankle & the back of my right hand.

The planning application verdict didn’t come through today. It is going to be a long Long Weekend.

My husband will.not. us a non white towel. There was a hot pink towel on the rack yesterday and he stood in the shower until I replaced it with a white one. Oy!

I am loving my garden. Lots of veg are ready to go into the ground this weekend and there will be more next weekend. Myself and two TV shows have convinced M to go with raised beds next year. The ground in the area formerly known as The Pit is crap. It is FAR too stony and would take forever to dig out the significant stones & then we would have to fill in the space with manure & topsoil. Why not raise beds and fill them in with manure & top soil. That also solves the problem of “Where is D allowed to walk?”

Some good news, some not so good news & one of lifes regrets May 29, 2008

Posted by Laura in finances, pregnancy.
10 comments

The DHL man tried to deliver my RED Birkenstocks today but I was in town so I missed him. He is coming back tomorrow (not so good & good news)

The statement of earnings came from my very old employer and I seriously over estimated the tax I had paid but such is life. (not so good news)

I have very few regrets in life but I sat on the balcony watching my mother & D in the swimming pool this afternoon and regretted ringing my clinic in August 06 to ask what their opinion of swimming while pregnant was. Their opinion is don’t risk it and having had 2 miscarriages I am not risking anything so I can’t get into the water with them. (one of lifes regrets)

I’m lovin it May 28, 2008

Posted by Laura in parenting.
6 comments

I have to say that I am loving NaComLeavMo! I have found some really interesting blogs and for some reason a lot of the ones I have come across so far are in the middle of an IVF cycle at the moment (but not many who are waiting to cycle soon or are just finished) and a good few who are as pregnant as I am (give or take a week). I am really loving the comments. I haven’t automatically been posting a comment on the most recent post on other blogs and today I got my first out of sync comment which was nice to see.

Today was a tough day. There are some days when I am not a great Mamma to D (and he is not a great boy for his Mamma). I dragged him around the Supermarket today and it was a painful experience. All he wanted was a carry-up and I couldn’t do that for him (no lifting aside I had a basket full of groceries). 45 minutes in the garden after M got home cleared both our heads, lifted our spirits & returned peace to our relationship. It also got my mange tout and spinach potted on and one step closer to going into the ground.

I was so tired today. I had to have a lie down in the afternoon. When I am lying down D likes to touch my face, a lot. It never bothered me but since I got pregnant I CAN’T STAND IT!!!

Oh, I got an email yesterday to say that my Birkenstocks are ON THEIR WAY!! Yesterday I told D that my new sandals were coming and he said “Maybe they gonna be (pause) RED!” with the most gleeful face I have ever seen.

I have been busy May 27, 2008

Posted by Laura in finances, parenting, pregnancy.
10 comments

We are finally *almost* ready to submit our audit form. What a process it has been to complete 4 sections on a 16 page document. The upside of it all is that for the first 14 weeks of 2005 I worked and paid tax as though I were going to work for the whole of 2005 but I didn’t work again until December ’05 (D was born in April ’05) I will get the proper figures tomorrow but my rough calculation is that I paid more than €3500 in tax that didn’t need to be paid. I will know in the morning what the exact figure is. As much of a PITA as the whole audit is I had completely forgotten that I paid tax and therefore didn’t claim it back.

I don’t talk about D very much but today he was just the cutest. He was saying the same thing to M over and over so M, in jest, said “Talk to the hand”. With that D walked over, got right up in M’s hand and said “Hello…. hand” We all rolled around the place. He was in such a funny mood this evening. M & D watched Pimp My Ride together & D was very impressed when the men broke the windows on the car 🙂

Morning sickness, or 16 hour a day sickness, essentially all my waking hours sickness is grating on me now. I need to eat but don’t want to. I eat but it doesn’t ring my bell which means I don’t feel satisfied. It is a bad cycle.

The heart continues to beat in my belly and with that I find so much peace.

Middle Third May 25, 2008

Posted by Laura in finances, Garden, pregnancy.
11 comments

There is a road in Dublin called Middle Third. What a fantastically cool name for a road! Anyway, the point of Middle Third is that today I entered the 2nd trimester. I am 13w3d which is a complete mind blower.

Today is the start of NaComLeavMo. There are 214 names on the list so I cut & pasted them into Excel, sorted by name and started at the top. I can’t see myself getting through more than about 10 in a day but I will get through the 213 (excluding my own) in the month. As a point of note, I moderate all comments, that is why they don’t show up straight away.

After buying my maternity clothes online from the US on Tuesday the bank that I have my credit card with decided to suspend my Master.Card because the transaction was not in keeping with my spending habits & they needed to check it with me first. They tried my house phone & didn’t leave a message. They didn’t have a mobile phone number for me so made no further attempt to contact me. I now have to wait until tomorrow to see whether the transaction has gone ahead for the maternity clothes or if I am going to have to put the whole lot through again. AARRGGHH!!

A blast from the past May 23, 2008

Posted by Laura in Uncategorized.
3 comments

Almost 10 years ago I spent 3 weeks in rural South Africa with a pen pal that I met as a result of an ad placed in a newspaper. It was the most peaceful 3 weeks of my life. I read, I learned about cricket, I saw elephants and lions and leopards and rhino and buffalo and a cheetah (and many more animals) in the wild, where they should be. It was a fantastic experience and I remember it with fondness.

Over time IVF took over from my hobbies and interests and then pregnancy on D took away my ability to function beyond just staying alive and growing a baby. In that time I lost touch with my pen pal.

Tonight I got an email from him, out of the blue. A one line blast from the past. As much as this pregnancy fills my heart with love that email made my brain smile.

Some day I will go back there, the next time I will bring my husband and children though and we will see oolifants where they belong.

I am going shopping May 20, 2008

Posted by Laura in pregnancy.
7 comments

Online, but shopping none the less. I am shopping for maternity clothes and red leather Birkenstocks. Actually, I am buying them!

These are my Birkenstocks to be:


I am in love with them already.

We had horrendously long waits both for the midwife & the doctor today. The history was taken, blood was drawn, extra tests were done because of my history of high blood pressure in pregnancy, shock was expressed over the fact that D was 10lb10.5oz coming out and I was informed that I would have to have a glucose tolerance test, to which I replied “No problem, I passed the last one with flying colours”.

Then we waited and waited and waited to see the doctor. When we got in there we ran through the history again, and she finally asked us if we wanted to go next door for a scan, Um, YEAH! I lie down, she put on the gel, put on the probe on and there it was, my baby and its heart, beating away. M was over the other side of the room (he didn’t want to watch) pacing. Then the baby started to move, arms waving, legs kicking and ultimately started doing push offs on the side of my uterus, far too cool! She left the probe on for ages and watched the baby moving around. The baby measured (CTR) 13w3d which was nice as I am 12w5d.


I am back for an anomaly scan in 8 weeks (July 15th).

Now I must order my clothes before I go to bed!

Are you nervous Lowie? May 19, 2008

Posted by Laura in pregnancy.
1 comment so far

Today M asked me if I am nervous about tomorrows appointment and the honest answer is no. I hear the heartbeat daily and I can do nothing to keep it beating other than believe that it will continue to beat. Knowing daily that my baby is alive has allowed me to remain calm over the last 10 days. Without the doppler I would have turned into an unpleasant pool of nastiness by now.

I was asked last week about concerns about the safety of using a doppler and the impact it could have on the baby. I thought about it momentarily and said that the possible (unproven) damage to the baby while I listen to the heartbeat for a maximum of 30 seconds cannot be worse than the toxins that would be pumping through my system by now if I were overstressed by the wait for tomorrows scan. I would also say that the endorphins that are running through me because of knowing the heartbeat is there are also a good thing. Interestingly D prefers to listen to Mamma’s heartbeat than the baby’s!

The original plan for tomorrow was that I would go to work in the morning, come home, have lunch, get us all into the car & drive to Dublin. All because 2 of my staff members were going to be off. One of them was very apologetic when she told me that her meeting which was supposed to be all day tomorrow had been changed and would now be all day Wednesday and would that be OK? I assured her that it would be fine. So instead we are going to have a light breakfast and head to Dublin then. That way I can go bra shopping, we can try to find M’s tree identifying book and get some lunch rather than arriving at the door of the hospital throwing D at my mother & racing into the private rooms and have my BP taken. Not a good combination for a woman who suffers from pregnancy related hypertension!

My Ob rang yesterday (yes, on Sunday) to tell me that he is flying to the US tomorrow and had been booked on the evening flight but the airline has changed it and now he is flying in the afternoon. This means that he won’t be in the clinic tomorrow and would it be OK if I see his colleague. I felt like saying – if you can train a fish to do the scan then you could have a Pike sit in for you! I didn’t say that of course, I told him that that would be fine etc. He then asked me to hold as he was on call and had to take a call on the other line. This impressed me NO END. This man is the Master of the maternity hospital, he is the doctor boss and he still does his own on call! We waffled on then about a 20w anomaly scan and that he would see me after that etc. I explained that I did not want to see my GP for any of my visits (I am paying him €4500 for the pleasure of his company afterall) and he was fine with that.

12 weeks May 15, 2008

Posted by Laura in pregnancy.
6 comments

Today is my benchmark of miscarriage. The point at which this pregnancy is different to a discernible point in a previous, lost pregnancy. I am 12 weeks and as of this morning my baby’s heart is beating away inside its body, inside my body. It was so beautiful to hear it this morning. So special to lie there with my boy resting his head on my shoulder while we listened to Mamma’s body.

My symptoms are fairly mild today but that may simply because I ate fairly constantly and was busy. Although maybe it is because the 12w fairy waved her magic nausealess wand over our house last night. A girl can hope, can’t she?

As you can see from the panel on the left my drug list is dwindling. Soon there will only be ordinary women tablets to be taken. Officially from Tuesday, if everything goes well at the Ob appointment, I will be just like every other 12/13 week pregnant woman out there. I remember when we realised that we were just like the fertiles when I was pregnant with D. It was a funny feeling.

The next 28 weeks seem so long but they will pass. It has felt like a million years since I got my first line but it is only a little under 9 weeks ago.

The fact that I have the doppler and can hear the baby if/when I need to means I am not sitting here counting the hours until my appointment. It means I wasn’t crawling down the phone line when there was no cancellation for last Tuesday with the Ob.

I told my boss on Monday and I got the response I expected from a 50ish man. “Oh, OK, when is it due?” Then went into HR to get a risk assessment form and the HR woman told me it would have to be completed by the line manager. I said that it would be my boss (the regional manager) and she said (in a quiet voice) “Is it your line manager?” I said yes and she was all giddy & congratulatory. It was nice. It felt normal. It is nice to be normal.

So now I am taking my 12w pregnant normal ass to bed to read my book for a few minutes before I pass out.

Goodnight all

Our garden May 13, 2008

Posted by Laura in Garden.
4 comments

Firstly I am surprised that no one had anything to say about my post from Saturday night. Maybe it was a little more cryptic than I think it is and I simply confused people.

I have been so tired for so long and nauseated thrown on top of the tiredness that I simply hadn’t had the energy to get into the garden and get something started. Then 3 weeks ago on a beautiful

Tuesday afternoon D & I needed something to do while M was cooking on the BBQ, so we got some gardening trays out and got something started.

We planted (well, I put the peat in the tray & D put the seeds where I indicated then I made another layer of peat) spring onions, leek, kale & kohl rabi in one tray (top image) and in the other we put lots and lots of mixed cut & come again lettuce (bottom image). Those trays are now almost ready to plant on.


We have since made another two trays, this time adding mange tout (top image) & spinach (bottom image) to the mix.


It has been glorious here for the last few weeks and EVERYTHING is growing.

We have blossoms on our tiny apple tree.


We have flowers on our raspberry canes & new canes springing up everywhere

M’s unknown tree that lived in a pot in his parents yard in the middle of inner city Dublin for years is in full bloom in the garden.


M has grown horsechestnuts trees from chestnuts that he collected in Belvedere last Autumn.


Our blueberry is in flower


I feel so happy in my garden these days. I am so glad I got things planted and have more to do this week. I need to add purple sprouting broccoli & string beans into the next tray. Oh, and courgettes. M has decided he wants to grown corn. I have visions of a field of corn in my garden next year.